But my addiction to bubble gum is a different story. No, what I want to discuss here is something much more sinister--something that ancient folk would never have predicted (because they were unaware Satan had an evil twin).
CAPITALISM.
Yes, that is the evil consuming human society. It hurts more people than it helps, simply because we need money to live happy, regular lives. And if you don't have enough money to go on vacation, or even go see a movie, then you are doomed to live a very stressful, tense, mediocre life.
"Hold the phone," you say. "If the world ain't got no dough, then what the heck are we gonna use to buy things?"
Chickens.
That's right, I said chickens. Chickens, canned foods, cars, televisions, phones, computers, furniture, cows, artwork, music, lampshades, tweezers, microphones, clothes hangers . . . the list could go on and on until the end of time.
You see, people had it made when they used the barter system. Literally, THEY HAD IT MADE. Whatever they needed, they made it, and if they couldn't make what they needed, they'd make something else and trade that something for the thing they needed that they couldn't make in the first place.
"But wait," you say. "I can't MAKE myself a toaster oven. We have factories to make toaster ovens. You can't pay the factory workers with chickens--no one would work there!"
Okay, I see your point. But how about this: instead of big business factories that monopolize the market for their product and raise the prices so much that we can't afford them simply because they have no competition, I suggest that Mom & Pop shops come back into play. Small business should be the norm in this country, and around the world. Yes, it would be a pain in the ass, especially when you just want to galumph into the nearest Walmart where you can buy your food and your garden supplies and your hunting gear all at once.
Just imagine this scenario for a moment. You grow green beans in your back yard. You harvest those green beans, stick 'em in a basket, and ride your bike into town to the local drugstore. You go to the clerk and show them your green beans.
"Hey," you say to the clerk. "I've got some damn fine home made green beans here, freshly harvested. Can I get a bottle of Tylenol, a bottle of Aspirin, and a tube of Preparation H, please?"
The clerk nods, gets your items, takes your green beans, and off you go with your medicine. Now, what does the clerk do with those green beans? Well, he goes to the move theatre with his wife and trades them for tickets. The theatre owner will take those green beans to her house and cook 'em for dinner and have a lovely meal.
Trading is fun, right? Remember Pokemon cards? C'mon, kids--you can't deny that as soon as you opened your little pack of cards that cost your mama $3.59 you shuffled through them to see if you got a special card that you could trade for your next door neighbor's Chancey because let's just face it Chancey is way cute.
Did you pay your neighbor 50 cents for their cards? (If you did, boy, you were a born capitalist.) No, you traded.
Obviously the fact that I'm talking about the barter system means that I have not studied economics or politics enough to understand that trading could not work in today's society. Yeah, I get that. The barter system had its run, and now it's done.
The point of this shabang is that I want people to take a look at what money has done to them. And when I mean "done," I mean, how has money affected you personally? How has it affected your health, your outlook on life? Would you be happier with more money? If you've struggled with money at some time or another, did you feel like you couldn't live the way you wanted because you didn't have enough money?
My parents lived in California in the 90s and had to file bankruptcy. It's not a good thing for your credit score. In fact, it basically ruins you as far as getting loans and stuff from the bank--they don't trust you to handle your money anymore. So my parents moved me and my brother across the country to Pennsylvania. We rented house after house, never buying because we just couldn't afford it.
Growing up I never thought my parents were having financial troubles. I was carefree, and my parents did a great job hiding their stress and anxiety from us kids. They took us to parks to play instead of buying us video games. They read us books at the library instead of taking us to movie theatres. They got a lot of hand-me-down clothes and toys from their friends whose kids were older than us. They tried to save money.
The thing is, life might have been just great for us kids, but for my parents it was a nightmare. They both worked. My mom became ill and had to quit working, so we only had one income. See, it was when my brother and I got older that we started wanted money. All our friends were getting money, they were getting cell phones and cars and computers--and finally my parents sat us down and told us that we just couldn't afford those things.
It confused me, knowing that all these other kids had soooo many things and I couldn't have them because of money. Without money, you're constantly worrying about putting food on the table, or paying the next bill, or even wondering if you can afford to have a house.
Right now my family is homeless. I mean, we have a house down in Tennessee, but we're renting it out--we can't even afford to move back into our house if we wanted, because the renters are paying the monthly payments for us. We can't afford to make the payments on the house ourselves.
Basically, both my parents are older now and yet they do not have security in life. It's not fair. It's not fair to them, because I see now how hard they've worked their whole lives trying to live a comfortable life, and right now nothing is comfortable for them. My dad lives in a cabin without running water or heating with our four animals; not only does he have to take care of the animals, heat the wood stove, and fetch water from the pump, but he's having to job hunt at the same time. Meanwhile my mom lives with her parents in Illinois because she has no place else to go.
I feel lucky being in college where at least I have hot showers and three meals a day and don't have to think about paying the next rent bill or even wondering where I will live this year.
Money is too important, and it makes me sad.
Things are only going to get more expensive. We have to live our lives working our butts off to make enough money just to buy groceries. If you're lucky, you'll get a great job or get promoted and buy yourself a nice mansion in the woods somewhere--but for the rest of us who can't catch a break, it feels like if only we had some money, life would be so much nicer. Life would really be worth living.
And it sucks that human existence has been reduced to something so superficial, something as insignificant as a piece of paper with green print. How we live depends so much on our money. There is no equality in the world--that's a concept that exists in the minds of optimistic people.
Yes, ever since the early humans began roaming the earth, we've had to fight to make our way. We've had to compete, we've had to have an edge to survive. But why, in this day and age, does survival come with such a high price? Why does happiness have to be packaged with a stack of Benjamins?
There's no cure, there's no way to lock up this "evil twin" called money. Our world is centered around it. People are greedy because of it and will do terrible things in order to have more of it.
And you know what? Money only buys us THINGS.
What good are things, when you're lying on your deathbed, staring into the eyes of your loved ones, knowing that it's the end? Does your LCD TV give you a longer life? Will your Egyptian cotton sheets come to your rescue? No. Things don't mean anything in the big picture--we just get so addicted to things that we tend to forget that one day none of it will matter, and in the end, what we contributed to the world will matter much, much more.
Okay. Yeah. I'm done trying to assert my Utopian ideals.
Just keep in mind, when you're gazing into the sunset from the deck of a huge cruise ship sailing to Bermuda, that money means everything. Having it means you don't have to be a 60 year old woman with no place to live, sacrificing everything you have in order to support your two grown children. Having money means you don't go to sleep at night in tears because all you want is a house to call your own; a roof that belongs to you, not anyone else.
I promise my next post will be more comical.
